By Tom Quiner
Those heartless Republicans.
Reliable sources suggest that should they regain power, Republicans have a final solution on how to solve the immigration problem.
The plan is this: they will galvanize NRA members and Tea Party members (pardon the redundancy) to scour the countryside, the ghettos, and the barrios and round up illegal immigrants.
The Justice Department won’t do it, so by golly, Republicans and their goons will get the job done.
With guns in hand, they will demand to see a Social Security card from suspicious characters which confirms American personhood. If the confronted person cannot present one, they will be dragged to the outskirts of town where they will be immediately shot and terminated.
No burial services will take place. Rather, their bodies will be unceremoniously dumped into an open pit and burned. In some cases, body parts and stem cells will be harvested and sold to people in need.
One of the sickest parts of the Republican plan is to use taxpayer money to pay a bounty for each terminated illegal alien. The GOP believes this to be a more efficient use of taxpayer money than paying for the healthcare, education, and welfare of the freeloaders. A bounty is pennies on the dollar compared to what we’re paying right now.
Best estimates suggest that only a million illegal aliens can be rounded up and terminated per year. With roughly twelve million illegals in the country, the entire clean-up operation will take a dozen years at most.
Logically, some will try to escape by fleeing across the border, most likely our Southern border. Republicans indicated that they are open to paying bounties even if illegals are terminated after they’ve crossed the border into a neighboring country.
If you find the idea of these one million deaths per year repugnant, you should vote Democrat.
How could any Constitution-loving American tolerate such evil, such lack of due-process of law?
You know, of course, that I made this all up. Republicans are plotting no such thing.
This is called political satire. Astute readers know what I’m doing.
Everything described above is ACTUALLY happening in this country right now.
One million innocent people a year ARE dying violent deaths.
They DON’T have Social Security cards.
Their cells HAVE been harvested.
Taxpayers DO foot the bill for some of their deaths.
Some are killed AFTER escaping their first brush with death.
The Democratic Party DOES support the violence.
The Democratic Party viciously fights ANY legislation to lessen the carnage.
The victims are the pre born.
In light of this, how could anyone vote for such a political party?