Lost and clueless

By Tom Quiner

I just received the brief story below via e-mail. I have no clue who wrote it, so I’m sorry to the author for lack of attribution. However, it’s pretty funny and worth sharing.


A woman in a hot-air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.”  “I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your  information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to  me.”

The man smiled and responded, “You must be an Obama Democrat.”  “I am,”
replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”

“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you are going.
You’ve risen to where you are, due to a large  quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”


  1. Tom Maly on November 26, 2011 at 4:04 pm

    Way Cute!!! i think this story was forwarded to me some time ago but have no idea of it’s origin.

  2. Lori on November 27, 2011 at 6:15 am

    I love it! Especially, “now it’s my fault”. Very funny.

  3. Theresa Dowd on November 27, 2011 at 6:54 am

    Oh, I do love this. Hahaha!

  4. Lisa Bourne on November 27, 2011 at 7:25 am


  5. hoboduke on November 27, 2011 at 11:07 am

    Love the illustration that it’s better to criticize those you demand help you, then to actually take action yourself.

  6. juwannadoright on November 27, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    Well put and frighteningly true!