Jay Leno's best Obama jokes
By Tom Quiner
Jay Leno knew how to poke fun at politicians, even President Obama.
The president has been immune from the usual level of ridicule heaped on former presidents. Fortunately, Leno felt no such restraint:
“If President Obama really wants to hurt the Syrian government, don’t send cruise missiles. He should end over some of his economic advisers.”
“One of President Obama’s winning points last night was about how sanctions against Iran are crippling their economy. And believe me, if anyone knows how to cripple an economy, it’s President Obama.”
“President Obama’s approval rating is down to 39 percent. And Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, who admitted to smoking crack cocaine, went up to 49 percent. How does this make Obama feel? He’d be better off smoking crack than passing Obamacare.”
“So far for Halloween, sales of Obama masks are 30 percent higher than the sales of Mitt Romney masks. That makes sense. I mean, what’s scarier than four more years of this economy?”
“The good news for the White House is that unemployment has dropped to 7.8 percent, right where it was when President Obama took office. So Obama has gone from ‘Change you can believe in’ to ‘Can you believe there’s no change.’”
“They say close to 60 million people may have watched the debate. In fact, the only person who didn’t tune in was President Obama. What happened?”
“A man in Florida has been arrested for wearing a President Obama mask while robbing a McDonald’s. This Obama robber made some pretty scary threats to the McDonald’s employees. He said, ‘Give me your money, or else my economic plan will have you working here for the rest of your life.’”
“According to The New York Times, more than half of President Obama’s Twitter followers are fake. They don’t even exist. Which is actually a good thing because if they did exist there wouldn’t be any jobs for them.”
“President Obama is brewing his own beer in the White House. Actually, the White House beer is a lot like the Obama administration – great buzz, weak finish.”
“Mitt Romney is predicting that as president, he will create 12 million jobs in his first term. Well, President Obama says a Romney presidency would result in lost jobs. Yeah, his and Biden’s.”
“President Obama has revealed his new re-election slogan — ‘Forward.’ That’s a good message for Obama. He’s telling voters, ‘Whatever you do, don’t look back at all those campaign promises I made.’”
“President Obama released his tax returns. It turns out he made $900,000 less in 2011 then he did in 2010. You know what that means? Even Obama is doing worse under President Obama.”
“President Obama admitted this week that a former girlfriend that he wrote about in his autobiography was made up and not a real person . . . So Obama had an imaginary girlfriend. Big deal! He had an imaginary economic plan. It’s all the same.”