The “Fence Test”

By Tom Quiner

It came by e-mail yesterday.

You may have already read this, but it’s pretty, darn funny, so I’m sharing it with Quiner’s Diner readers who may have missed it.

This is a great way to distinguish between the political parties. The e-mail attributed the piece to comedian, Jeff Foxworthy. Snopes said he didn’t write it. Whatever. It’s still funny!


This is straight forward country thinking

Which side of the fence?

If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!

If a Republican doesn’t like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a Democrat doesn’t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a Republican is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a Democrat is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a Republican is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a Democrat is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a Republican is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A Democrat wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a Republican doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Democrats demand that those they don’t like be shut down.

If a Republican is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
A Democrat non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced.

If a Republican decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A Democrat demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a Republican reads this, he’ll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A Democrat will delete it because he’s “offended”.

If you’re a Republican, be sure to forward this and/or post it on your Facebook page!


  1. Shawn Pavlik on April 25, 2013 at 2:43 pm

    I always check snopes anytime I get one of these…

    Foxworthy didn’t write this….but it is humorous nevertheless….

    • quinersdiner on April 25, 2013 at 2:52 pm

      Thanks for the heads up.